Crash x2

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My Dad was in a car accident yesterday. His second crash in 2 weeks. He’s blacking out while driving. So he kept driving. He didn’t tell us about the first one in fear that we, his children, would worry. Little does he know that I worry about him all the time anyway. He’s my Dad, he’s got a heart condition, he’s going through a divorce, he lives a lone, 45 minutes away. 45 minutes is nothing to drive for a short visit with my Dad, but it’s a freakin long 45 minutes for an ambulance driver. We experience this in January 2005, in a blizzard no less.

He says he can’t remember anything the first time but waking up and hitting the guard rail, and yesterday he woke up driving 60 through a field off of the highway and hitting 2 trees. He only remembers waking up.

I cringed when the nurse told my husband, “It looked intentional, the ambulance driver said there were no skid marks”. I know my Dad, and I don’t believe either of these accidents were intentional, but I didn’t enjoy hearing the words. Please don’t talk about my Dad that way.

He wouldn’t come to my house to stay. He wants to be at home, where he says he’s happier……45 minutes away from me.

But I’ll make you food. I can take you to the doctor, I begged.

You’ll make me healthy food, and you have to work all day. Don’t treat me like a child, he says.

I just want to know why the black outs keep happening. It didn’t seem to me that the hospital did enough tests, they wanted him to stay over night but he wouldn’t. What made it worse was the accident happened half way between his home and 2 hour travel to visit my grandmother so he was 40 minutes away from his home and about an hour and a half for us.

Of all days for me to be at work until 7:00, unreachable by cell phone or work phone. Brother went to the hospital, he said dad wouldn’t reveal anything to the hospital and that he had to spill the beans, after my dad told him what was happening with the black outs.

I know where I get my stubbornness from. I will try to give in to that in the future, for the sake of those who care about me.

It’s only fair. People just want to help. We just want to help.

And my husband wraps his arms around me and says, “you didn’t cry…I thought for sure would cry.”

“He’s being too much of a jerk for me to cry”

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