The One Where I Resemble Elvis

Dear Boss Guy,

4 weeks ago you gave me 120 dollars to get my passport. Not surprisingly, you gave me a dead line date of October 9th to have it mailed in by, since you know, you gave me cash and were probably afraid I’d make a made dash to the mall rather then the City Center, and believe you me, I thought about it.

3 weeks ago when I was playing extra sick so I could miss worksick, I knew that one thing I had to do was get my ass up off the couch to at least get to Walgreens for my picture and drop my package off at the City Center. I slept until eleven so you can guess when I walked out of the house at noon, that I wasn’t looking my most glamorous. I did the best I could….hair cutely placed in messy bun on head, head band to add something girly, mascara and earrings. My usual casual look with a sore throat to match.

I tell the photo guy what I need and he brings me over in front of this pull down map, minus the map, and starts to focus the camara. Then to my dismay he yells across the store, “Hey Amanda, this camera doesn’t zoom?”

“No, it’s broken, hey she can’t have that headband in….or the earrings…..oh and no logos on shirts!” And to that I said, “Hey, am I applying for a passport or going to prison?”

I looked down at my shirt, shit, I could not go home to change!

Photo Guy came through for me though, “I’ll do my best to just get your head, and none of your shirt.”

Said head he did get.

You can imagine my excitement when I received my passport in the mail yesterday, not only am I sans anything remotely girly, my lip is a little curled up on one side, as I was sort of speaking when he hit the button, and my puffy sick face is the entire picture.

So Dear Boss Guy, I’m ready now.

Paris! Italy! London! Here I come………er……right?

Your Favorite Employee,

Leave a comment


  1. Stephanie

     /  October 25, 2007

    Damn. And passport pictures are like 10 years right? Egh.

    But on the plus side, you will be doing some international traveling?

  2. A Novelist

     /  October 25, 2007

    UGH I hate when that happens…

    When I didn’t like my picture on my driver’s license, I would go back weeks later and say I lost it, or it was damaged, just to get a new one with a better picture. LOL. 🙂

  3. my life is brilliant

     /  October 26, 2007

    I just had to get a new driver’s license after the whole name change thing. I had to go take my picture after waking up at 5:45 a.m., finding out my flight was cancelled, getting bused 2 hours to the airport my new flight was departing from, and then flying 4 hours back to Dallas.

    Of course when I came home, I primped for about 5 minutes, but there’s only so much you can do for yourself after a day like that — especially when there’s no time to shower.

    I’m dreading that piece of mail!


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