A Letter to my Second Son

Dear G:

Here we are, 30, almost 31 weeks into the pregnancy and I am just now writing you a letter.  With Luke, I had probably written eleven letters by now, but who needs to go back and count?  It’s inevitable, the Second Child Shaft as I’m officially naming it.  I can relate, my son, I am too a second child and while your Uncles baby book was overflowing with extra pages of notes and pictures, mine was barely full past the first half.  I can promise as far your baby book goes, this will not happen.

It was last night around 3:30 am when I woke to your ever-loving kicks married with tossing and turning.  Oh sure, I felt your brother move a lot but you are different.  You are much more persistent in your movement and it almost seems as if you are reminding me that you are there, but trust me, I don’t forget.

It’s hard for me to admit that I am not enjoying being pregnant this second time, but trust me when I say that does not have anything to do with not wanting you.  I am already in love with you and I’m probably a little more excited to meet you than I was with your older brother.  This is one of the advantages of being second born.  Yes, there are a lot of great things that first-born children get to experience along with the parents, but the same thing goes for the second born. While it might seem redundant, it’s not, it’s just different and my curiosity is over flowing.  How will you be similar?  How will you be different?  What will you look like? I cannot wait to experience these things.  I cannot wait to go into labor and to experience how you choose to be born, I can’t wait to experience your story.

You were always part of the conversations between me and your father after Luke was born.  We never decided that our family was complete but I guess we didn’t know if we would get to be so lucky.  If we were deserving of such another wonderful experience, no matter how difficult the  journey.  But we are lucky.  And we are blessed.  And when we found out you were coming, and we were probably a little shocked and more afraid than the first time.

Maybe someday you will experience this, and maybe you won’t, but one thing is for certain….you cannot quite grasp it until you are there…living the moment.

I can’t wait for you to meet your big brother.  Your daddy and I try to talk to him about it and while sometimes it doesn’t seem like he gets it, there are other times when he climbs up on lap, pats my belly and says, “There, there, Baby G, there, there.”

I’ve had a pretty awesome two and a half years hanging out with your brother but when I think about these years coming up with both of you, I get butterflies.  I cannot wait to experience you as siblings, laughing, giggling, fighting, plotting, climbing….oh boy, it’s going to be a ride but I think it’s going to be pretty fun.

More than anything in life, I want you to feel safe and loved.  And if your tiny baby foot feels the safest in my rib right now, then you just leave it there.  I will live.

We have 10 short weeks to go. I can’t wait to meet you.  We all can’t wait to meet you.

Love, love, love,

Mommy

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4 Comments

  1. Sassafrass

     /  February 3, 2011

    Ummm, what did you have for breakfast, you and I are on the same wavelength!

    New baby is totally screwed because OE’s baby book is so pathetic.

    Reply
  2. I absolutely cannot wait to experience your story as you experience his. xoxo

    Reply
  3. Such a loving mother!! Two little boys are soooo much fun and soooo hair-raising at the same time. It’s a blast (most of the time)!!

    Reply
  4. You’re making me teary eyed over here!!!
    My little sister always complains that she has no “records” compared to me. It’s definitely a second born thing 🙂

    Reply

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