Today is a day for confessions. Maybe it’s because I’ve done something mean recently to make me feel the need to confess. I won’t go into it now but I promise that it was out of character for me and while I feel bad about it to some extent, I also don’t feel bad about it because I’m tired of people thinking they get to call all the shots while I walk around on egg shells. Or matchbox cars. Both are equally painful. Especially in the middle of the night.

I’m a bottle propper. As in when my babies eat they do it in a bouncy or a swing with a blanket propping up their bottle.

I started this with Luke because our experience with breast feeding didn’t work out so I pumped. It’s not possible to pump and hold a baby and feed him. That’s when I decided to set him up with a propped bottle and sit right next to him pumping. Eventually I got ahead enough with my milk supply to not have to do that but then if I tried to hold him and feed him he squirmed and fussed until I put him back in the bouncy with his bottle propped and he was happy. He was fine any other time I held him or played with him but he got used to eating with a propped bottle and preferred it that way.

I didn’t realize this was controversial until a friend saw me do it. She wasn’t judging me, she had done that a few times too. Like once she was at Target and did it and an older lady stopped her and yelled at her for it. That’s when she read up on it and read about all the controversy.

For a minute it broke my heart because here I thought I was doing all I could to make sure my son got breast milk and I was doing that wrong. Nice. Mother’s guilt is the best.

I started doing it with Gavin too. It’s just not easy to always tend to Luke while Gavin was eating. Mother’s guilt times two is the best. I haven’t done it as consistently as I did with Luke but I’m noticing over these last two weeks that he also squirming and fidgety when trying to feed him but when I set him down and prop it he’s happy. He’s also trying to hold the bottle by himself so it might have more to with that.

So you can revoke my Mother of the Year reward anytime.

There’s more.


I have a tattoo. I actually have two but I forget about the one on my lower back all the time because I don’t see it all the time. While the tattoo on my foot is very meaningful to me, I do regret it. Every time I’m getting dressed up for a summer wedding, I regret it even more. I just think it’s a bad idea to get a tattoo that people can see so often. Tattoos should only be seen if naked. It’s easier to control who sees you naked than who sees you on a random hot day with your flip flops on.

Here’s the first picture I took of my feet. You can’t really see the tattoo but you can feel the sunshine.


If only it wasn’t 91degrees at 8:21 in the morning.

Now it’s your turn. Confess something. Give me some comments to read since it’s too hot to go outside.

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  1. Huh. I know nothing about bottle propping…what are these controversies you speak of? Everyone judges everyone. I guess it’s a fact of life.

    • Stacey

       /  July 21, 2011

      I guess there’s a possibility they could choke, and I did read an article where an infant died in a crib from bottle propping, but it was propped with a pillow. I don’t and wouldn’t do it in the crib. He is always supervised, I don’t leave for an hour and come back. At night I hold it in his mouth for him until he’s done. One time I fell asleep holding Luke and he fell off my lap (in the middle of the night) so I’m afraid of that. Holding for him while he lays there keeps me awake.

  2. Michelle

     /  July 21, 2011

    I love the feet and sunshine. A photo journal, one per day. Good idea. I’m enjoying all the photos. Your very good at it.

  3. I heard about the bottle propping. I don’t think you’re a bad person. Sometimes I should brush Ian’s teeth better, but he gives me such hell when I try to that some mornings his barely brushed teeth don’t get brushed again until the evening. And I worry that I’m letting him get away with something that is so important to do!

    • Stacey

       /  July 21, 2011

      Luke loves to brush his teeth HIMSELF so I try to get in there every few days to get it good but even that’s a fight because he’s finding his independence. He’s going to the dentist in August. I hope he likes it.

  4. I thought bottle propping was only a bad thing if you put the kid in a corner and then just left for a while. If your kids like it and you’re watching, I don’t see a problem.

    I like your foot tattoo.

  5. Oh, I forgot I was supposed to confess something. Umm… Sometimes I wake H up in the middle of the night on purpose when I’m up with the baby and then I pretend it was an accident.

    I haven’t vaccuumed my living room in… 3 weeks? Maybe more.

  6. Sass

     /  July 22, 2011

    Huh. Never heard of bottle propping and Kristen is right, someone always has something negative to say about something. I think Mommy instincts always win against the negativity.

  7. Your tattoo is awfully pretty, but I can understand not loving it when you’re all dressed up and whatnot. Mine is on my back and you can’t see it unless I’m naked or awkwardly bending over. There was a patron at the library who saw it and then commented on it (for probably 10 awkward minutes) a few days later. So so creepy and, ugh. I only wear very long shirts to work now.

  8. jc

     /  July 27, 2011

    I want to be a SAHM more than ANYTHING


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